2 March 2018
TESLA arrives in Slovakia.
In February, Elon Musk will announce his intention to build his first plant in Europe. Choosing the right destination will be very easy. He told his assistant to write down all EU Member States and to throw them into a hat, from which he picked one. Guess who will draw the short straw? Furthermore, Musk announced that he does not intend to delay for long, so he decided that they must arrive within one month.
The new plant will be located in Tesárske Mlyňany. Before one month has passed, Tesárske Mlyňany will have been renamed Teslárske Mlyňany.
3. June 2018
Joining forces in automotive.
The unbelievable will have become true. Some KIA Slovakia genius will be friends with some IKEA Slovakia genius. In fact, the latter will be from Žilina and will travel back home from Bratislava to the North once every 3 weeks. They will get a brilliant idea in the middle of a Borovička bender. Next week, both of them will convince their individual boss about this plan, then they will jointly convince their bosses about their plan. This is how it will reach the top positions in Seoul or Stockholm and everyone will have presented this plan as their own.
As early as the middle of June, world media will report that KIA and IKEA are joining forces. One of them will supply the engine/bodywork, and the other the whole interior, making you feel like you’re in your own living room.
Believe it or not, you will be able to put the whole interior together by yourself. Of course, the production team will have been most worried about this step. Their work will have been jeopardised by self-proclaimed experts from all over the world.
The new car will be called IKIA.
13. September 2018
The government of the Slovak Republic will ban the flying car.
Just a short time ago, people from all over the world whooped and applauded for our national treasure, a levitating car or an Aeromobile. The project will have been better off without Štefan Pipo Klein and the car will start being sold in large quantities from the beginning of the year. There were several minor bugs in the project from the start. Let’s just give one example – nobody will have wanted a flying car. The shocked government of the Slovak Republic, afraid of losing its great reputation at home and abroad, decided to do something about this as soon as possible. So the government decided to buy the Aeromobile itself and to give it to the Slovaks as a reward for good behaviour. And since the Slovaks are an obedient nation of yes-people, there will soon be more cars in the air than on the roads. Then the National Council of the Slovak Republic will have realised that this was an unfortunate step. Suddenly, people will no longer need of roads or tunnels, which will in turn make the sponsors of political parties extremely unhappy. So, on 13 September, the Prime Minister will stand in front of the cameras and announce that the career of the flying car or Aeromobile is over. We have no choice but to say that this car had a very short range.
6. December 2018
There is something they can learn from us.
At the end of the year, thanks to GQsystems, Slovakia will have become one of the most influential countries in the field of quality.
The Germans, Japanese, Swedes and other quality countries producing quality cars will have started to come here in great numbers. The trick is that GQ will have succeeded in bringing together all the major engineers and managers in the automotive industry, then hired them further at affordable prices to suppliers, subcontractors and the car manufacturers themselves at home and abroad. And thanks to that, GQsystems will have become a billion-dollar company with an enormous, positive index. 🙂
That’s all from us and stay healthy in 2018!